Sweat

Two things that make me a little uneasy are the thick, funk smell of sweat, and the wet, schlorpy sound of someone chewing noodles with their mouth open.

I get both of these today. 

Couple that with rude, well-dressed, 50-something women (a pack of them), and it's just a delightfully spirited trip!

The middle of the train is creaking like a submarine diving too quickly. It's quite amusing to see the alarm on exactly nobody's face over this aberration. Maybe it's just because I ride so frequently I even notice.

Cross

Lady next to me is having an annoyingly loud conversation with a guy a ways away from her, so her head is turned and she is speaking loudly in my ear across me.

A mom just got on and has her stroller in the wheelchair spot again. I mean, I suppose at this hour she is at least out of the way. The kid has a little Tupperware full of mixed fruit. So much better than pop tarts or goldfish crackers.

There is a lot of mixed perfume on this train. My nose is confused and twitchy. 

Today is feeling oddly positive, though. I'm in a surprisingly good mood.

El-oh-el

Crowded Friday rush hour train and you are butt-hurt you and your four friends with your five bicycles want to push on? What's this? A wall of citizens collectively preventing you from getting on?

Excellent! Nothing brings people together like the social fight against mass douchebaggery.

What an amazing day out today! Sunny, breezy, 68 degrees, and some girl somewhere on this train is wearing Gucci perfume. This has brought a huge, happy smile to my face. I bet I look crazy. But that is because I am: Crazy in love.

Adventure

Guy in front of me holding a pair of brightly-colored skis. My guess is he is heading up to the mountain to get a last run in before spring melts it all.

Phone-bible guy is sitting next to me scrolling through his good book. Easter is next weekend, so maybe he is brushing up on his verse. He smells thick of that old church incense. It reminds me of another time.

A buxom redhead girl just got on the train. She is attractive, but I can tell she "knows it," and it makes me roll my eyes and go back to typing. There is a line after confidence people cross and she flew past that.

Stinky

A guy wearing way too much cologne bitched at a guy who got on because he smells like cigarettes. It was fantastic.

So I move and sit next to this other guy.. Who has a dog on his lap who is in dire need of a bath. In all honesty both of them are as he smells like B.O. and the dog smells like dog shit and mud.

Unwashed guido sitting across from me is loving to talk on his phone. He really needs a manners lesson but I don't have time to go to jail right now. 

Lucky him!

It's beautiful outside and I am done for the day. Time to relax and enjoy some warmth.

Shiver

There are defining moments in every man's life that shape him. These are the "A Ha!" moments that form who he is as a person and the purpose he has in the world in which he lives.

Today was not such a day. I just woke up cold, my sheets twisted around me like failed origami, and mostly fell out of bed. It's a very, "go through the motions," type of morning.

Tomorrow is Friday, though, and worth looking forward.  I should be looking forward to today, not tomorrow, so I will try out my optimism pants today.

I'm in a rear-facing seat so I am looking at the faces of most people riding, and I see a lot of tired despair. Why do we, as a society, spend so many decades of our lives so miserable in order to appreciate a handful of good moments? It should be at least equal, right? Who thought this was a good idea?

We all do this willingly, so it won't ever change. 

Much

Even if it smells good, too much of a good thing is overwhelming for your fellow riders. Why is it so difficult to moderate your perfume? Jesus.

Bible guy is reading the bible on his shiny new smartphone. I hope it has the ability to dogear and highlight the passages that are meaningful to him. Nothing quite like the real book to pour over. 

It's way easier to pretend to be a good person than actually be a good person. Religion is just escapism like any other form of entertainment.

Boy am I feeling judgy today. I think I need breakfast. 

Crowd

Quite a few folks on this train. I still see no rhyme or reason for the rise and fall in ridership day over day.

Barely have room to type here all clustered up. This isn't a bad thing. Going to throw on some music and relax.

Wee!

Grand

Very old lady talking to a young boy she apparently knows. The boy's father stands nearby, and it appears they are family friends or something. 

From the moment the kid and his dad got on the train, this old lady has talked endlessly. A constant stream of creaky, shaky talk about our nice weather and why weathermen aren't that accurate. "Highly paid guessers," she says.

Her nose is hooked, her face frozen into a creased, leathery permanent grin, and she is talking so loudly I can hear her over Tool blaring into my ears. 

It's too early for Tool.  

Eww

It is warm outside. The news days 71, my app says 72, the bank display says 78. I believe the bank ( not something that happens frequently.)

I am in my black wool coat and feeling quite toasty. I could use a fan blowing on me.

And a cold beer... definitely beer.

Late

Woke up late. Caught a late train. Might have been really weird,

But ran into my friend and we are talking about music and work. I'm waking up faster than usual talking about stuff I enjoy.

I need to wake up doing this stuff. Man would be nice to look forward to the day.

High

Greetings from 40,002 feet. It's the sweet spot we have been toying with the last two hours trying to find less turbulence than a Class 3 rapid. 

The two things about that last statement that are silly are: 1) "We" aren't doing shit, the pilot is doing all the work, and 2) comparing one mode of transportation to another is silly. 

There is a coughing hacking baby up front with and ignorant mother doing specifically nothing about it. I heard her explain to someone in her row that, "babies will be babies!" The thoughts in my head were unkind to say the least.

Before I boarded, I attempted to splurge the $45 to upgrade to economy plus class for more leg room. I like the space. Plus I can almost kinda afford that kinda luxury (fingers crossed).

They declined my card. Something in the translation hated me. There is money there but maybe it didn't like the out-of-state crap, or I fat-fingered my card number, so I tried twice and said screw it. My guess is either.. Whatever. 

I get to my seat and lo and behold: no middle person. Arm flips up. Didn't need the upgrade so that ended up being a huge plus.

This weekend went too stupid fast. Why can't my Mon-Fri speed by at such a clip. 

We are officially over Oregon now. Going to nap the last 39 minutes. I'll have an hour train ride after this until home. I just want to pass out and try to not let go of my memories of a good weekend.

Busy

There seems to be little in the way of a pattern that dictates it the train will be relaxed and mildly populated or tense and packed. Today is the latter. Lots of shoulder to shoulder "get to know ya" riders. I remember working the later 9a-6p shift and being in bliss most of the time in both directions.

But getting home at 7p was a little annoying. Felt like I had no time to do anything. Being home by 4:45p is so much more rewarding.

Totally worth the bleary-eyed mornings and train-sex afternoons. 

Elders

Culturally, I've noticed something interesting while riding this train for years, and that is how different cultures treat their elders. Now you have to understand that this comes from a lot of people watching and observation. This is not simply a random opinion.

The order in which the most respect is shown to least is:

1.) Asians, specifically Japanese. Not only offering their seats, but have seen more than one younger person seek out seating for an older man or woman.

2.) African-american. Again, quick to stand and offer seating. It's been very heartening to see such respect to elders. Make and female both offer seating.

3.) White people. Not as frequently but it happens a lot. It's mostly men getting up. The most rare being young girls giving their seats to older women.

4.) Latinos. A whole lot of "go fuck yourself" mentality. Big difference. Mostly from the younger girls. In fact, I've seen young girls race old Latino women to a seat to take it from them. It's sickening. 

Again, this is years of observation, so I'm just saying what I have seen. Have I seen a Mexican guy offer his seat? Yep! Have I seen a Asian hipster actively ignore an older lady? Absolutely. But those are aberrations.

Weird, eh?

Strollers

Packed trains are no places for strollers, bicycles, and loud phones playing games with their sound maxed out. Shoving your way on and making scoffing remarks is just beyond the pale.

I don't know how some of you people consider yourselves useful members of society, but you are the colossal yin to the pleasant yang of people who hold doors, offer seats to elderly, and say, "thank you," when appropriate.

Please stop going out into public. You are unnecessarily using up valuable air and space.