Motor

Perhaps if you have a motorcycle, you don't need to take it on the train. It's bad enough when there are a lot of bicycles preventing people from standing, but this is a new level of silly. On top of all that, sitting down and resting your foot protectively on it just amplifies your douchiness. 

For the record, autocorrect tried to make "douchiness" change to "sour chives."

Also: it's bad enough if your headphones are turned up so loudly on you that everyone around can share in your poor choice of music, but that you insist on teeth-whistling along with the music makes you a Grade A Certified jackass.